A Valentine’s Rant

((( Note: posting a couple of days post-V-Day, thanks to certain hotel chains that want to egregiously charge for internet. )))

What’s love got to do with it?

I don’t want to be one of those Valentine’s naysayers, but I think I’m going to have to be.

Actually, that’s not even correct. I’m not a naysayer of Valentine’s. I’m a naysayer of people who complain about Valentine’s.

I’m out of town for work this week and so I’m not spending Valentine’s Day with Ducks. But, guess what? We’re both okay with that, because it’s just a day. Sure, it’s nice to recognize it, but what’s not nice is to make the holiday into an ambush.

I’ve definitely been guilty of this in the past. In fact, as I was driving up to the Capitol City (which is where I’m working today), I was thinking about what an emotional basketcase I was when Ducks and I were dating in college, and how if he’d had any sense whatsoever, he would have kicked me to the curb about six years ago! Why? Because I was always crying, or having a temper tantrum or setting him up for arguments. And why did I do all these crazy things? Because I was emulating what society sets up for us as a reasonable way of life – that women should act difficult and test men by saying things like, “Oh, let’s just not celebrate Valentine’s this year,” then freaking out and getting emotional when the man ACTUALLY TAKES WHAT YOU SAY AT FACE VALUE.

So, why am I Valen-grinching today? I don’t know. I guess because I don’t want to see people’s silly Facebook statuses about “how dare their husband book a lunch meeting at work on Valentine’s Day when they’re not going to be able to go out to dinner tonight?” Well, maybe your husband did that because IT’S HIS JOB.

I’m all for romance, and loving gestures, and consideration, and, yes, for dinners out and candy and flowers and whatever else – but it needs to be from love, not from obligation, or the whole thing’s worthless, right?

But, anyway, I still love a box of chocolate or a bottle of champagne as much as the next girl – I just hope I’ve grown out of guilting someone into buying something I’m perfectly capable of purchasing myself if it’s such a big deal.

Am I right, or am I just being a crab because I’m typing this while I’m lying on a hotel bed away from home and I’m begrudging everyone else their festivities? I don’t think that’s it, but willing to hear some perspectives. 😉

Sidenote: Got my Valentine from my daddy this weekend. He’s so good – he always remembers all his girls in some way. Love, love, love to him.

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4 responses to “A Valentine’s Rant

  1. Because of dating long distance and our anniversaries before Valentine’s Day, Nick and I always celebrated the weekend before or after instead of panicking about having to do something on that very day. This year, that turned out to be a great deal since I had an absolutely killer migraine when I got home from work Monday night. Yeah, Feb. 14 really isn’t the be-all and end-all.

  2. Aww, your dad is your Valentine too? My dad still is. He brought me a candy heart at my office 🙂 I love him.

  3. Totally agree – it’s nice to celebrate love but it’s just one day!

    Aww how sweet is your dad!

  4. I think we women really do make it hard on them in mid-February. There’s enough pressure on the guys already, the least you can do is be honest with him (not that I didn’t pull the same stuff in college). I think most guys deep down just want to make their girlfriends/wives happy, and because of the enormous amount of pressure, they sometimes forget how to do that on this one day. Then they end up in the dog house for not being psychic. There should probably be a “guys night out with beer” right after Vday so they can recover.

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