Tag Archives: law school wife

Wear Teal Day – This Friday

Teal.

Wear it!

This Friday is National Wear Teal Day and I am asking that everyone who can to wear teal to support my mother-in-law in her fight against ovarian cancer.

Now, there seems to be a conspiracy against me finding the perfect teal, because as Attorney at Large said, true teal exists only as a platonic ideal. So it’s everything from this: 

To this

 

To this

 

 Whatever shade of teal you wear, you’ll be helping to promote awareness of and activism against a disease that is prevalent and that affects women daily. Did you know…

  • There is no early detection test for ovarian cancer?
  • One in 71 women will develop the disease in their lifetime?
  •  More than 15,000 women die of ovarian cancer each year in the US?

 I’ve contacted a volunteer organization to try to give my time to promote a cure. And, I’m promoting awareness and supporting my mother-in-law by wearing teal. I hope you’ll join with me and do the same. If you choose to blog about it, I will post a link up later this week. If you would be willing to share your photos, so that I can in turn share them with my mother-in-law and father-in-law, but you don’t want to blog about it or don’t have a blog of your own, I would love for you to email me at legalwifeintx@gmail.com so I can share them with her on Friday when I see her.

 From the bottom of my heart, I appreciate your support of my mother-in-law. Also, my little “nephew” BB says “Thanks for teal-ing out!” (My lovely sister arranged a “Wear Teal” day early at her office since she wouldn’t be able to participate this Friday.)

BB rocks the teal!

College Colors Day and Sic ‘Em!

I’m linking up with Mrs. Jones for college football season, which kicks off this weekend!

In the world of college football, I’m a relatively new fan. A lot of people grew up supporting a specific school, wearing Longhorn onesies or Crimson Tide jackets of Horned Frog cheerleader outfits or something like that. But, even though I grew up in a sports family, I didn’t grow up with a strong college football affiliation. My dad played college football at a small school that no longer has a football program, and my mother, the consummate hater of sports throughout my childhood years, certainly didn’t identify with any team. She’s the kind of person who refers to sports as my dad’s “mistress” and used to make us children do rankings of who we thought our father loved more, God, sports or his children.But I digress.

Anyway, so I grew up collecting Major League Baseball cards, wearing Dallas Cowboys gear and singing the “I’m a Dallas Mavericks fan” commercial jingle. But I didn’t grow up sporting a specific college team’s colors.

And then I fell in love.

Not with my husband, although that happened soon after, but with Baylor University. And I made up for lost time. Not so much, admittedly, while I was in school, because it’s a little hard to fall in love with one of the very, very worst programs in the BCS. I fell in love, though, with the atmosphere and the camaraderie of the college game day.

Of course, Ducks helped.

He grew up in TCU’s backyard but is now one of the most loyal BU fans in existence. Dating and marrying someone who’s equally as big a sports fan as my father helped a lot, because my schedules began to revolve around our team, and our conversations began to trend around which recruits were taking their official visits and how we might be able to telepathically convince them to come to our school.

And then there was the era of Art Briles.

Which is, of course, better known as the RG3 era (so far).

RGIII Being RGIII

This was one of the greatest nights in Baylor history.

It’s amazing – the way it feels to be a fan of a perpetual cellar-dweller, and then the difference as you watch your school emerge into the name that’s on everyone’s lips. Jim Rome derided us as “Scrubby lil’ Baylor,” then took it back, begrudgingly, after our sports programs made history as the winningest university in the NCAA. Ever.

So, that leads to the colors thing. Today is college colors day and I’m “flinging my green and gold afar “(that’s a line from the alma mater)” in a green shirt for work, and still sporting my teal-green nails. Since I’ll never be a good photographer, especially while trying to self-portrait with an iPhone camera, I am offering up some historical photos with the fam (sorry about the dots. No one in my family is aware of this blog, so I don’t have their permission to share their personal photos online).  

Me + sister at the Elite Eight (I’m on the left). I know you don’t recognize me with that yellow thing on my face!

Ducks, me and my sisters

Happy College Colors Day and sic ‘em, Bears!

Heavy Hearted

So, I try to usually be funny, and I can occasionally be a little pouty or whiny on this blog, but today I’m genuinely heavy hearted.

Last week, we found out that my mother-in-law’s cancer has returned. It’s been a recurring theme for the past several years, but I try not to talk about it too much (see here, here, here). She was first diagnosed more than three years ago, and has been such a brave, strong survivor throughout. She’s done everything from continuing to exercise to becoming vegan in her quest to remain healthy.

It is so very frustrating to see someone who does all the right things have to continue to struggle. It’s heart-rending to know that she’s having trouble with breathing because the cancer is attacking her. It started as ovarian cancer and has spread to a couple of different places – lymph nodes and lungs.

So, I’m asking for two things from you, blog friends. One is your prayers and support, and the other is your advice. We live four hours from my in-laws, and thanks to law school, we’re tied down to San Antonio for at least another year. We can’t be there on a daily basis to help them with meals or to drive her to chemo sessions. We are doing what we can – calling, texting, praying, sending cards, but what else can we do to support them?

Today, just as a little something to make myself feel better, I painted my nails teal, which is the color for ovarian cancer.

Image

I sent the picture to my mother-in-law just to show her I was being supportive, and I’m spending lunch shopping for clothes for “Wear Teal Day” which is Sept. 7. But, what else can we do? Have any of you been in a similar situation and can you offer any advice. Thanks in advance for the kind words, kind thoughts and prayers.

 

PS If anyone would like the link to the blog about my MIL’s cancer survivor journey, just post your email address in the comments and I will send it to you.

I’m Not That Crazy

Most of the time, I am a pretty reasonable, responsible, sedate adult woman.

Most of the time, I do act my age (all of it – all 28 years) or better. In fact, one of my friends in her late 30s has actually mentioned feeling like we just “click” and relate well to each other because I’m so mature for my late 20s (a time in which many, I suppose, still have a predilection for Girls Gone Wild and one-night stands with inappropriate men).

But, anyway, most of the time I act in totally responsible adult ways – paying the bills on time, calculating the per ounce price of generic versus brand name green beans, driving close to the speed limit. There’s just one area where I can’t seem to control myself, and where my personality does a U-turn.

It’s when I decide to accost teenage boys.

Now, it’s not quite as nefarious as it sounds. I’m not showing up on their doorsteps dressed in nothing but a trench coat and waiting to lure them into all manner of vice.

No, I accost them right out in the street, or in the gym, wherever I happen to see them.

There’s probably a technical name for this sickness, you know, something like Beiber Fever (not that I would ever dream of throwing myself at Justin Beiber – perish the long-haired effeminate thought). But, at the root of it is this – I’m just too proud of my alma mater.

Yes, I can’t keep from spewing admiration and word vomit at the high school students being recruited to play marquee sports at my university. On two occasions, I’m not proud to say, I’ve actually REACHED. OUT. AND. TOUCHED. THESE. KIDS. (on the arm, don’t get too weirded out) without permission.

My voice goes to an unnaturally high pitch and I squeak out some brilliance like, “Hey – welcome to BU!” at a pitch that makes dogs whimper. I get giddy about this. I consider it a celebrity sighting. Seriously, if you asked me whether I’d rather meet Kobe Bryant or the player I accosted recently (whose name I can’t write because I might die of EMBARASSMENT), the choice is unmistakable. I’m going for the 17-year-old kid who was probably being born about 30 miles away from my home town with I was in fifth grade.

I had the chance to meet (and by meet, I mean follow, track down and tap on the arm) the previously mentioned player recently. Shame of shame, I recognized his face from too much Twitter and online research. At least, I thought he looked familiar, and when I saw his name printed on the back of his All-Star jersey, I went in for the kill. What brilliant statement did I use to attract his attention? “We’re looking forward to watching you play at [school name] next year.” If there were a Pulitzer for introductions, that one would have undoubtedly been a unanimous winner. But, it gets better. He smiled, he was gracious and he took in my husband’s neon highlighter shirt with [school name] blazoned across it with a smile (By the way, the only reason said husband wasn’t the first person to approach this player with a fanboy attitude was that he probably had his nose buried in his player memorization flash cards. If only that approach worked in law school as well as it does for learning rosters).

Of course, just shouting out the kid on the street wasn’t enough. I also immediately, before even getting to the car, had to find him via my mobile phone and tweet him, saying, “Hey, I just met you, and yes I’m crazy. But you go to my school. So follow me maybe.” Or something of that nature.

This wasn’t even the worst of my collegiate athlete celebrity encounters. On the very worst, I forced my college student sister to take a picture with a high-ranking incoming player. Okay, multiple pictures with multiple high-ranking, signed recruits. With her camera. While I waxed eloquent about “Oh my gosh, we’re so excited you’re coming here next year.” You know, a reprise of that speech that won me the verbal Pulitzer. She was furious.

But I never really pay attention to anything said by a 19-year-old wearing a t-shirt with a cat on it. Really – surely I don’t look that crazy.

11s

I got this quiz/survey/whatever from my friend Stef‘s blog. Sometimes I get a little caught up in the humdrumness of the law school life and I can’t think about anything to blog besides my desire to win the lottery, quit my job and pay off law school debts. So, naturally, things like this help me to think outside the law school blogging box. 

1. What is your most favorite place on Earth?

Favorite place on a regular day – sad to say it, but my bed. I never get to spend enough time there and it is so ridiculously comfortable. The first instant of sliding into bed and encountering the softness of the pillowtop and the snuggliness of the covers (and my husband if I’m lucky) is really without equal. 

However, favorite place ever is anywhere beside water. I really feel like my best self when I’m near the ocean. 

2. If you woke up with an extra $10,000 tomorrow, what’s the first thing you would buy? {and DON’T say ‘pay off debt’. LAME.}

Okay, if paying off law school debt is prohibited, then I’d book our tickets for our post-law school celebratory trip. We’re thinking Maui but haven’t yet decided how we’re paying for it. Sounds great, though, right?

3. Facebook, or Twitter?

Absoutely Twitter. The avenues of stalking are so much greater on Twitter. You may think I’m kidding, but how else would I know what my favorite basketball players had for lunch or how their girlfriends are decorating their baby’s room? EXACTLY. 

4. What’s your favorite book?

I leaned toward Emma for a really long time, but as I’ve gotten older, I think Pride and Prejudice takes the top spot. The only reason why it didn’t before was probably because I didn’t want to seem like one of those people who saw the movie and picked it as their favorite. But really, there are too many to name. A few other favorite authors: Lucy Maud Montgomery, Marian Keyes, Maeve Binchy…. and, yeah, I guess there are still too many to count. 

5. If you could go back and do one thing differently THIS WEEK, what would it be?

Not have eaten my whole meal at the really excellent Chinese restaurant we visited. It was too good, though, to resist the temptation. 

6. What’s one thing you wish you knew how to do really well?

Something highly crafty, like knitting or needlepointing. I don’t have the time or patience to learn right now, but I just found out that the cougar my brother-in-law (more on this later) is dating knitted my mother-in-law something. She shall not use her crafty wiles to supplant me! 

7. Iced tea: sweet or unsweet?

A true Southerner should always say sweet, right? I do like sweet tea, but I can’t drink very much of it or I get comatose. Maybe a half-and-half? 

8. If you were stranded on a deserted island tomorrow, who would you want to be stranded with? {ONE person only!}

My husband. This would actually be almost too good to be true. Can someone arrange it? 

9. Have you, or have you not, ever thought about ordering a pair of pajama jeans? {no lying!!}

Nooooooooooooooooooooooo.

10. What do you love/hate about blogging?

Love: Getting to know other bloggers and connecting with cool people. Also, getting to write for people and hopefully provide amusement or thought-provokingness or something.  Hate: I don’t often have time to write, so then I start feeling guilty over something that was meant to be a fun hobby to begin with. 

11. How do you know me?

I know Stef from the BBCE (best book club ever). I’m still just a new member, but these women are SMART and they are always very inspirational in their discussions. 

11 Random Things: 

1. I organized my whole kitchen this weekend. I am mad because I wanted to share the pics, but I forgot to take “before” shots of the clutter and chaos. 

2. I haven’t seen any of the 80s movies that everyone loves – Breakfast Club, St. Elmo’s Fire, Pretty in Pink, etc. 

3. I have a new eating plan that includes vegetables for specific meals. I’ve explain in more detail after I see how successful it is. 

4. If I start a book, it is really hard for me to do anything else before finishing it. I think it could truly be called an addiction. 

5. I shot baskets yesterday and today. I have definitely lost my touch from earlier years, but it felt awesome to be outdoors and active. 

6. I am the world’s worst at MarioKart or any game that involves driving. 

7. I had forgotten how happy “Flight of the Conchords” songs make me. Seriously. Those guys are funny. 

8. The thing I’m most dreading this next week is scrubbing out our big garbage bin, which reeks right now. Truly horrifying. Oh, also, on Tuesday night, I have three hours of JL training. That ranks right up there as well. 

9. I’ve lost 19 pounds since January. When I lose one more pound, I will get a reward, but I haven’t decided what it should be. 

10. Breaking Bad is an excellent TV show. It’s our newest summer addiction. 

11. My husband is the best because he already has a stack of birthday presents piled up for me in the corner of our living room. Frabjous day. 🙂 

So, there you go. 11 questions and 11 random things – you now know quite a lot more about me. Hope you have a wonderful, wonderful day! 

Strings

Sometimes the difference between my parents and my in-laws is really striking to me. I love my parents, especially my father, but I am amazed at the difference they have in their attitude toward their children.

My in-laws are really all about what they can do for us. They are obsessed with spending time with us. They send us thoughtful birthday gifts, send cards on our anniversary and enjoy treating us with things like trips and outings.

My mother, on the other hand, is all about what she can get from us. I think it stems from the fact that she never wanted children. But, regardless, she has always thought of children as her own personal servants or slaves. Growing up, we did all the work around the house. She was bitter about everything, and became irrationally angry if she had to take us to any extracurricular activities or if we wanted to do anything with friends. She cloaked all her controlling behavior behind God’s will. She really never let up on her controlling and borderline-abusive behavior until Ducks and I got married and she realized that I could choose between her and my in-laws on who to spend time with and that I could truly sever all ties with her if I wanted to. Even when she tries to do something nice, it’s in her own way. For example, she bought us a rug that she happened to find on sale when doing a real estate deal. She didn’t let me see it or anything beforehand, just purchased it, then expected me to put it in my living room, although it looks terrible and doesn’t match the style of anything else we own. And we can’t do anything about it, because she’d be mortally offended if we removed it.

That brings me to this past week. My father-in-law took Ducks and I to the coast for the weekend. He paid for the house, our meals, etc., without asking for anything in return other than our company. That’s not to say that he can’t exert his own form of selfishness or be wearing sometimes. BUT, I am offering this up in contrast with what my mother has done this week.

For my birthday (which is coming up in a few weeks), she gave me a starter kit of facial cleansers from a company that she recently signed up to do sales with. However, apparently, the gift comes with strings attached. To get this gift, she SIGNED ME UP AS A SALESPERSON. So now, what was supposedly a nice birthday gift to help me with shrinking the size of some pores near my nose, has become a nightmare of being bombarded with emails and phone calls encouraging me to go to trainings and to sell these products. Great birthday gift, right? I have less than zero interest in selling ANYTHING. In fact, I am actively disinterested in selling anything.

I do not typically have any free time. I can’t even keep with my work and professional commitments. There is no way that I’m going to go out shilling any kind of product. And, yet, she won’t get the message through her head. I’m trying to be kind about it, because she is very excited about starting to sell this stuff. However, what can I do? I feel deceptive when her director keeps calling me, asking me about attending training, etc. Should I return the gift to cut the attached strings? How should I handle this?

Oh, Jealousy

I am guessing that I must be a kind of bitter person lately. I’m jealous of everyone, it seems. 

At this very moment, my stomach is twisting in knots because I just found out via Facebook that a girl I grew up with (since we were 3 and lived on the same street) is expecting. 

It makes it more ridiculous to be jealous because we’re not even trying. But I felt the same way when Ducks’ best friend from high school and his wife made a similar announcement around Easter. 

And it doesn’t stop there. If it were just hormonal/biological clock issues, that would make sense. But I’m jealous of people who post their travel pictures, who are out having fun and being fancy free. I’m jealous of people who have better jobs than me, and I’m jealous of the people I work with who don’t seem to care about anything besides staying at the office from 8:30 to 5, then going home and putting work out of their minds. And, I’m most jealous of the stay-at-home wives, the ones who can do what they want when they want. 

I think this is one of the worst things about law school, because it’s easy to see the common thread in all my jealousies. It’s freedom. Being able to choose what you want to do and when you want to do it. Being free to say, “Let’s have a baby,” because you’re not worried about student loans and mortgage payments. Being free to say, “You know that money in savings, let’s use it to go here.” Image

because you know that you should be using it to pay down debt. Honestly, I can’t even make myself buy frivolous things. A few weeks ago, I got a huge and unexpected bonus from work. And I went to Hobby Lobby at lunch that day and couldn’t even convince myself into buying trinkets there because I didn’t want to frivolously spend money that needs to be used for debt. 

So, that’s where I am right now. I’m really contented with life and happy for the people among my acquaintance who are producing offspring and drinking wine in Tuscany (although, obviously, those are two disparate groups of friends), but I’m just having a hard time at times being thankful for the many blessings I have – a goal-oriented husband, a good job, and a bright future. 

Do these moods strike you? What do you do to count your blessings and keep a bright outlook on life?